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Katherine and I are both, for various reasons, vegitarians.

Yet we go through an average of 30 pounds of dead bird every month to feed our ravening little beasts.

In fact, we just got through making up the latest batch of cat food. 12 pounds of boneless, skinless Turkey thighs, a pound of chicken hearts and a pound of chicken livers, mixed with six crushed tables of bone meal, plus six crushed cat vitamin tablets for trace minerals, plus eight thousand milligrams of taurine (because taurine deficiency is cats is just about one of the worst things that can happen to them). We also dump in about four cups of the grease from the turkey, plus all of the grease from the hearts and livers.

Twice a day, we mix about a cup of this with a tablespoon of vitamineral mix (calcium, wheat bran for fiber, yeast, and a bit of kelp), plus another 300 milligrams of taurine, a raw egg yolk, and a cooked egg white, and a bit of fish oil for fatty acids.

On Saturday, we smash five of the cat vitamins and mix them in.

Why do we do this?

Well, because we'd rather they not get kidney failure because their food if full of waste plastic from China.

But honestly, it's actually kind of fun. Not so much the handling 14 pounds of dead bird parts at a time, but their reaction. When we started this, back during the big pet food recall, they would run from the food processor. Now, we start the processor, and they line up waiting for me to drop bits of turkey, so they can pounce.

Yes, my cats have a Pavlovian response to the sound of a food processor.

And that's how you can tell we love our cats.